as the wheels turn

Tumblr

2011-10-03T19:45:00.000-07:00

It has been so long since I posted that I figure everyone has moved on and that's cool, I just wanted to tell my loyal followers that I now have a tumblr account, which I hope to update more frequently. And I'd like this just to be not made public on facebook :)

http://www.tumblr.com/tumblelog/danav1

I Love Lucy

2009-10-24T19:25:00.000-07:00

Last week was Lucy's birthday! She turned 1, on October 15th, and I treated her to a spa treatment for the occasion :) I can't describe how much happiness she has brought me this year! All I can say is that she finds a way to love me even though it isn't easy! If I get close to a piece of furniture these days, that's her cue to jump on for a ride, and that melts my heart every time :)

2 years

2009-07-08T16:37:00.000-07:00

Well, it is hard for me to believe that it has been 2 years (Friday) since my brother Tim passed. I still at times am stopped suddenly by the thought that he is gone, and I wonder if that will ever change. My intent, though, is not to wallow in sadness, but instead to simply acknowledge the day, because I would never want him to think he is forgotten.

Despite his failing health in later years, I will always try to remember him as he is in this picture. Mom said I was scared of the photographer, and was crying, so Tim put his arm around me to comfort me. Because he continued after that to be the one person to whom I could tell my silliest fears, and always receive assurance that everything was ok, I choose to think, though at times it is a challenge, that somehow he has his reassuring arm around me even now.

Remember when

2008-08-31T18:34:00.000-07:00

I saw the following on my friend Jennie's blog and thought it seemed fun and interesting, so I participated. Now it’s my turn to see what memories you have of me.

It’s game time! Here’s how to play…

1. As a comment on my blog, leave a memory that you have of me. It doesn’t matter if you knew me a little or a lot, anything you remember!

2. Next, re-post these instructions on your blog and see who leaves a memory about you.

5 good things

2008-06-11T16:36:00.000-07:00

Because a good friend, and one of the people I admire most posted a list of 5 good things, and because it hit me that no matter how bad you feel about things, there are at least 5 good things, I've decided to break my trend of not posting:

1. My family - My parents, siblings, nephews and niece.

2. My friends - The people who know that the times you aren't real fun to be around won't last forever, and let you know it too. You know who you are.

3. Big shiny new Macs.

4. Sunshine.

5. Modern technology.

Reconsidering

2007-12-25T19:17:00.000-08:00

OK, will you guys think badly of me if I decide NOT to do Stride & Ride this year? The thing is, every time I think about it, I have this horrible sense of dread. Those of you who know me well know that while I'm quick with a smile, I'm not real keen on sharing my emotions with most people, so when I think of going to Stride & Ride, I think of the inevitable condolences and inquiries that I will face, and I'm not sure I'm at a place where I can smile my way through that. And I know that you guys would be there to support me, but I think I need a year of healing... does that make sense? When it occurred to me that I don't HAVE to do it this year, I felt this huge sense of relief, so I think I'm not going to do it. I hope that doesn't make me weak, and maybe I'll feel differently after the holidays, but for now that's where I am.

absence makes the heart go fonder... ?

2007-10-08T15:51:00.000-07:00

Hi gang. I know it has been forever since I posted. I just haven't been able to make myself do it, but I have a bit of business to take care of and decided the best way to get started again is just do it.

I have been debating whether or not to do Stride & Ride this year... I've been worried that it will be really hard after just losing Tim, but there is no better reason to do it than his loss, so I will be there, and I would appreciate the attendance of any of you who are interested.

It is February 9th this year, and it will be at the UALR track & field building, which will allow for a later start time than normal - right now they are saying 10 am. More details will follow.

Please let me know if you are interested.

My brother's birthday.

2007-08-05T14:32:00.000-07:00

I haven't posted in a while, and might not for a while, but Monday August the 6th would have been Tim's 41st birthday, and I think he deserved so many posts that I didn't make soon enough.

I miss him more than I expected even. We argued like all brothers and sisters but he was always sweet and supportive to me in everything I did and he was always nicer to me than I was to him. That is something I'll regret forever. He taught me what it is to be happy with what you're given; something I have yet to master. He was the bravest, strongest (in the ways that matter) man I have ever met, and I am who I am because he was my brother.

Happy Birthday, Tim.

8 random thoughts inspired by Stephanie

2007-06-26T16:30:00.000-07:00

1. My first thought when starting this list was, “I don’t have 8 thoughts left.” I just got home from work.
2. I don’t understand why one person who I’ve been my best self for can’t ever say, “I’m happy for you,” or “you deserve to be happy.” And why do I care?
3. I find myself grinning a lot lately.
4. My bus driver yesterday tried to hit on me. EEEWWW. Talk about a LONG ride home.
5. I got my first manicure last week, and I enjoyed it but it didn’t rock my world.
6. One of my nephews had kidney trouble last week, and while thinking about it, I realized I would give up a kidney for any of them. It wasn’t that serious (thank God) but it was enlightening to realize how much I love them.
7. I finally started Sudoku and I LOVE it.
8. The disability rights resources in Arkansas are inadequate to say the least.

Bonus thought: I will try to be more positive soon.

Reasonable accommodation

2007-06-14T19:59:00.000-07:00

I work in a building with 3 floors. I work on the 2nd floor. When the fire alarm goes off, the elevator automatically locks up, so that no one can use it during a fire. Understandable but a little inconvenient for me. In the past, in these situations, 4 guys have carried me and my chair to safety, but we have fewer men working these days, and the ones upon whom I depended most have moved downstairs. Because of their move, my immediate supervisor requested my 7 person department be moved too. In the 14 years I have worked there, it has been so common for departments to relocate, that I can’t even count the times, but in this instance, knowing the situation with me and my chair, the powers that be denied our request to move, citing it as “unfeasible” and basically said I have 2 choices; be carried down without my chair (since the female co-workers couldn’t lift the chair) or work on the first floor alone, without my department. When I requested they reconsider, I was again told moving the department is “unfeasible” and was asked to offer alternative evacuation options. I, being told about the meeting to discuss this only an hour before it happened, could only stress how much I DO NOT want to be carried downstairs for a variety of reasons; pride and an inability to support myself comfortably once out of my chair among them, and suggested they either purchase a chair (customized because of my need for support) to be waiting for me downstairs once I am lifted, or purchase a wheelchair lift attached to the stairwell.

After the shock of the meeting wore off, I’ve decided to withdraw the suggestion about them purchasing a chair; so many things can happen and it just isn’t safe to be carried down. That only leaves the option of me working downstairs by myself, which I feel is segregation, them, buying a wheelchair lift, or moving us all downstairs which would be so much cheaper for them.

I have worked there 14 years and not asked for one accommodation to my disability, and I am so saddened by their attitudes.

Sometimes I just get tired of fighting.

anticlimactic

2007-05-22T16:29:00.000-07:00

For months I have been on pins and needles, worrying, or wondering what would happen when the sale of LA became final. Well, last week it became final, and what happened? NOTHING. Benefits are the same. Politics are the same. Meaningless work is the same. I don't mean to imply that I'm sad we didn't all get sacked, but I think a part of me was hoping to be forced to step outside the comfort zone containing 4 weeks of vacation time, 2 personal days, and 2 MONTHS of accumulated sick time.

Now it is all up to me.

DB - the final installment

2007-04-29T10:11:00.000-07:00

The reason I say this is my final post about DB, is that now that I'm getting to know him better, I think it is uncool to carry on about him. Not that the newness and excitement of our friendship is wearing off, on the contrary. It's just that now that it actually seems real, I want to keep it close. Having said that, in my last post, I mentioned that he suggested that we see a movie, and we did recently, so I thought my loyal readers would be happy to know that :)

The best thing about him is his thoughtfulness for sure. Even though he would have liked to have seen Wild Hogs, he knew that I wanted to see Reign Over Me, and insisted that we did, even though I warned him that my taste has been questioned. :) I know you don't want a play-by-play of the whole night, but here are a few things that I enjoyed: I ordered the tickets online to make it easier, and he said, "Rats" and didn't like it much that I paid, but conceded; He had to tell the person at the concession stand our order about 5 times, and he didn't seem the SLIGHTEST bit exasperated, though I was; He opened my Junior Mints for me without me having to ask; He sat on the edge of his seat almost the whole time so we could be shoulder-to-shoulder during the movie; and he said that I am probably the only person who could get him to go to a movie these days, and that he loved it and trusts my judgement in movies.

Needless to say, I had a great time. Sometimes when I see an article about him online or in the paper, I wonder why in the world he wants to spend time with plain old me. I know we're just friends, but he has friends ranging from ex-presidents to music royalty. The great thing is though, he never makes me feel less important than one of those people. I don't know how long we will be friends, or how our friendship will develop, but knowing him has renewed my self confidence in such a way that I will be eternally greatful.

The end.
:)

new blood

2007-03-30T18:18:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to mention my friend Dayle has joined the blooging world. Check her site out:
http://tonyanddayle.blogspot.com/

Also, my friend Keith has a blog that I find amusing, but he doesn't update often:
http://meltonworks.blogspot.com/

I hope you are all well :)

Those wiley handicapped people.

2007-03-11T13:16:00.000-07:00

On occasion I like to go to concerts, plays, musicals, etc. and when I do, I usually go with a couple of friends, or maybe my sister-in-law and my brother or niece. In the past, I’ve encountered minor problems when purchasing tickets, however. See you can’t just log on to ticketmaster or call them if you want a wheelchair accessible seat. Those tickets are sold only through the venue’s box office. Many times I have called the Alltel box office and requested to purchase 1 wheelchair accessible seat, and 2 accompanying seats, only to be told that they will only sell 1 accompanying seat for each wheelchair seat. I usually argue and end up with the requested tickets, but it’s a hassle.

Recently, I wanted to purchase tickets for myself, my mom, and her friend Joyce to see a show at the Robinson. This is my experience. I called and stated that I wanted to purchase Taylor Hicks tickets (enough already, it isn’t about that) and waited about 2 minutes for the voice on the line to respond, and when she ddidn’t, I said, “are you still there?” to which she replied, “yes, I’m getting on the computer, we don’t sell many of those tickets on the phone.” She proceeded to take my order, and then stated, “we can only sell 1 accompanying seat for the wheelchair accessible seat. You can only sit together if I can find an empty seat in your row.” To which I stated, “I just don’t understand how you can limit the number of seats I can purchase, but you can buy as many as you’d like,” to which I received, “I SAID I MIGHT find an empty seat on your row.” Now I’m generally nonconfrontational, but this attitude hacked me off and the “well that was rude” escaped before I could stop it. She then laughed and said, “I didn’t mean to be rude. We just have to tell people that.” And get ready for this part, “Because some handicapped people take advantage.”

Now will SOMEBODY please explain to me how a handicapped person wanting to purchase an accessible seat and X number of seats could be taking advantage??!! Folks, the tickets cost the same price!! So if I purchased 1 accessible seat, and 4500 accompanying seats, how is that taking advantage, and what’s their beef, they fill their auditorium???

I just don’t understand how they can legally limit the number of tickets I can purchase but not limit a non-handicapped person. If they are concerned about the availability of wheelchair accessible and accompanying seats, why can’t it be first come first serve like it is for the general public??

I no longer hate Valentine's Day.

2007-02-15T09:38:00.000-08:00

As some of you may now, for about 2 weeks now, the infamous DB and I have been planning to go to dinner for Valentine’s day at Capriccio’s downtown. Well of course, I got a sore throat the day before, and by the time we met, I had no voice. And of course, he made it ok. We met in the lobby about 15 minutes before our reservations, and he greeted me with a hug and a kiss, and then I told him I couldn’t talk, and he said it was ok, he would do most of the talking and read my lips. So as we waited, he got me a glass of water (he didn’t bring a straw the first time and had to go back, but said not to hesitate to tell him what I needed, and that I’d only have to tell him once, then he’d know), and I gave him a small painting (about 2.5 x 3 inches) I had made for him a while ago, and he loved it.

Then we went inside and it was nice, He said he asked the people at the restaurant if it was very noisy because his date lost her voice. He teased that I shouldn’t worry about my voice because it was probably all due to the black cloud that follows him, and would probably be better tomorrow. I told him I thought about canceling because I didn’t want to make him sick, but just couldn’t after all the trouble we’ve had coordinating schedules, and he said that he was glad I didn’t as long as it didn’t hurt my throat to talk.

We soon ordered dinner. I had soup, which we agreed might help my throat, and coke. He had salmon and veggies with diet coke. We talked non-stop, and we covered a lot of topics, some personal, and some not, and there were barely any lapses. As we talked, people would come up to him and speak to him, and he later told me that if he didn’t introduce me, it meant he didn’t know their name, which I thought was funny.

Did I mention how nice he looked in his black pants, black jacket, and black shirt with no tie? He commented that we both wore black and that he brought his camera and wanted to get a picture, but we forgot until we were leaving and it was too late.

After dinner, we decided to get dessert and share. I was worried about him eating after me, but he wasn’t and insisted I take the first bite of the godiva chocolate cake which was awesome! By this time we realized it was 9:50! (we had started at 7:15) and since I couldn’t talk over the noise, he called to see if my dad was waiting. He was, so DB walked me out and talked to my dad for a second, then he kissed me on the cheek and left.

He said to email him if I want to go see a movie soon, and I just might!
:)

Great day in the morning!!

2007-02-10T17:34:00.000-08:00

Today was the 3rd annual Stride & Ride event to benefit the Muscular Dystrophy Association, and what a day it was!

My team which consisted of Jennie, J, Wendy, Rebekah, Dayle, Carey, Stephanie, Lori, Keith, Eimear, and myself all shown here, and Diane, and Crystal who were absent but active fundraisers, raised $1871 (or more, I didn’t get an official tally) which at our request will go towards research for Spinal Muscular Atrophy.

I will never forget the day because it was one of those rare times when many of the people you care about are in one place.

Here is a picture of Wendy and Elisabeth Bryant. Could Wendy be any more beautiful?!! And that baby is TOO CUTE!!

And this is one of my favorite Jennie and J pics. I think their kindness shows in their eyes.

A special treat came when my old friend Keith, and his wife Eimear showed up with 3 of their 4 children, 2 of whom were less than 2 months old. This is a pic of Keith showing me one of the precious twins.

Without being mushy, I just want to say I felt truly loved today, and I will always value the friendship and support you guys so generously give to me :)

Contradiction

2007-01-07T17:53:00.000-08:00

I have to say one thing that REALLY bothers me is when congregations spend billions of dollars on a church. An example is the one on Shackleford; I think it is Immanuel, but I'm not sure. My feelings are that you can worship anywhere, and while you need a building large enough to serve all of the congregation, wouldn't it be more Christian to spend maybe 1 or 2 million on the sick, or homeless, or destitue?

And now that I've said that, I will make a guilty confession that sometimes, when I'm sitting outside and look up over the trees on a beautiful day, and see the cross topping that billion dollar church, I do feel a little bit closer to God. It is where I go to talk to Him. I know that you can talk to Him anywhere, but that is my place.

For what it's worth

2006-12-29T16:33:00.000-08:00

I really don't usually make New Year's resolutions, but I've been thinking about ways I could be a better Dana, and I came up with a list of 10. I'm posting it, which grants you, my friends, the right to tell me when I fall off track :)

1. stop using the phrase “what if”
2. have kinder thoughts about myself and others
3. procrastinate less
4. stop apologizing for who I am
5. save more money
6. speak up
7. stop using fatigue as an excuse
8. just let go sometimes
9. read more
10. stop expecting the worst

Happy New Year everybody!!!

More Striding and Riding

2006-11-28T17:52:00.000-08:00

First, thanks to all of you who have said you will walk with me; I love ya :)

Second, I need you guys to help me decide what our goal should be. Last year I think we did $65 a person. The MDA suggests we brainstorm a list of people to approach and ask for donations, but I know some of you aren't comfortable soliciting donations, so do what's comfortable to you. Remember we will have a team website and the email is a great way to ask for donations. Also, if you just know someone who'd like to walk without donating that's cool too.

In other words, I'd like some input from you all before I set up the site.

Striding & Riding

2006-10-29T13:13:00.000-08:00

I recently learned that the MDA's Stride & Ride fundraiser is going to be Saturday, February 3 this year. If you are willing to walk with me, please let me know. I was so happy with the amount our team contributed last year, and I think we could really pull together to beat those Stanton Striders this year :)

PS. Kathy, I know you will be otherwise occupied at that time!!
:)

The Long Road

2006-10-17T19:46:00.000-07:00

Last Sunday I had an experience that is still troubling me. I was shopping with my Mom, Melissa, Baby Grace, and Joyce at Dillard’s. We were just leaving the little girl’s department where we had been trying to find some new clothes for Grace, when some lady came up to my mom and asked if she could pray for her daughter (that would be me). My mom said she should ask me, and I said sure. See, I thought she was going to go home and pray for me, but no. She proceded to put her hands on me, in the middle of Dillard’s mind you, and asked the Lord to “MAKE THIS POOR CHILD NORMAL”. She quoted part of the bible that says if a believer lays their hands on the sick, they will be healed.

I feel a bit like a heathen, but I was MORTIFIED. I guess my biggest problem with this was that I know if anyone is a BELIEVER, it is my mother, and she lays her loving hands on me every day, so for this lady to think that she believed more than my loved ones… well, it seemed self indulgent to say the least. And I will be the first to admit that I have taken the long road towards finding my Faith, but I have reached a point where I DO believe in Christ, and I feel confused now because I wonder if I am wrong to feel as I do about her, but to me Faith and Religion are very personal issues. Maybe I’m just irritated because she used the term “normal”… doesn’t she know how many years I wished/prayed for that before I realized that I am just the way God wanted me to be?

Magic Camera

2006-10-10T18:45:00.000-07:00

This is one of the pics that DB took at the auction. I think that he has a magic camera besides being nice, because I don't think I look like that. I thought I would post it though, so I can look at it when I'm feeling down. :)

The Return of DB

2006-09-30T09:13:00.000-07:00

Earlier this year, I posted a story about meeting local celebrity, DB (most of you know who he is by now, but I still don’t think it would be nice to post his name). Since then, we have had a few email exchanges, and I have kept him posted on my volunteer work, painting, etc. When I told him that I was doing a painting for a charity auction, he asked me to tell him when the auction was, and said that he would try to stop by and place a bid on my piece, so I did, not really thinking he would come. You see, I’ve had some recent bad experiences with a "friend" who constantly promised to do things like that, but always had an excuse as to why he didn’t—usually it was somehow my fault.

To my complete surprise, and amazement, however, I looked up from my champagne glass Friday night and who did I see? Mr. DB himself smiling right at me. Though he was in the middle of moving, he took time off to come and place a bid on my painting. The plan was that he would then go home and unpack a little, and then I would call him before the auction closed and he would come back to finalize his bid. Well, much to my surprise (again) he came back before I called, and sat beside me during the live auction. I won’t describe every detail of the night, but I just want you to know what a gracious, thoughtful, kind man this is. My friend Stephanie won the raffle which was a $2850 diamond (I will let her tell that story, it’s hers to tell), and there DB was with a camera snapping her picture. He made sure to get several pictures of the evening, and promised to email them to me next week. At some point, someone asked if we were all together, and without missing a beat, DB said “yes”. That’s the way he was all night, just down-to-earth and friendly, and I will never forget his kindness. If you ever meet him and think he’s too nice to be sincere, think again. He had nothing to gain from being so nice Friday night, so I KNOW that is just how he truly is.

And the story wouldn’t be complete if I didn’t mention that once again, Wendy was in large part responsible for all of the above events. She gets me involved in things, and probably doesn’t even get how it perks up my life.

Happy Birthday Jennie!

2006-09-28T08:32:00.000-07:00

Today is my friend Jennie's birthday. Jennie is one of the sweetest people I know, and I feel like we've been friends since the second we met. She is so generous and kind. She has included me in her life, and shared her family and friends with me in such a way that I am amazed. I love you, Jennie, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!

A Random number of things about me

2006-08-30T18:02:00.000-07:00

This is a new list that ranges from very silly to very serious. While I know I'm posting this on a public place, I wrote it mainly for myself, so read at your own risk :)

1. I once sent a poem to poetry.com and felt pretty special when they offered to publish it until I found out that they offer to publish EVERYONE’s poetry.
2. I grew up in a neighborhood with many more boys than girls. Once, one of my brother’s buddies from school moved in down the street and he had a little sister. I was so excited because I thought I’d finally have a little girl friend, but the day they arranged for her to come play, I was wearing overalls and had a short haircut (I was about 4) and she thought I was a boy and ran home crying. She never came back.
3. Believe it or not, I once had a learner’s permit to drive a car. I did all of this studying, made arrangements to take the written exam, and rode public transportation to and fro the exam site, because my parents didn’t want me to; I even got rehab to pay for the evaluation after the exam. Problem was that the people at rehab DIDN’T KNOW that there is no place here in Arkansas to evaluate driver’s who may need extensive modifications, ie joystick controls.
4. I finally read the Harry Potter series and I do like it better than I thought I would.
5. OKAAAAYYYY, I’m obsessed with Harry Potter and can’t wait for the next book!
6. I am what I would call freckle-faced, but I haven’t always had so many freckles. When I was a kid, I had just one on each side of my nose, and I would say they went across the street to visit each other.
7. I scored high enough on my ACT’S to get a full scholarship anywhere (23 when 30 was perfect), but because I was in special-ed, the school district didn’t administer it in time, and I didn’t get it.
8. I used to have a Shaun Cassidy jacket.
9. I fear most of my readers are too young to know who Shaun Cassidy is.
10. My biggest regret in life will be not having children. I used to have nightmares about it, but not so much anymore.
11. I can’t hold a grudge. That’s not ALWAYS a good thing.
12. I like to make rhymes.
13. I see nothing wrong with a good knock-knock joke every now and then.
14. I am a light sleeper.
15. I buy at least 5 hair magazines a year. Why? They are all the same, but I can’t stop myself.
16. I am currently on my 4th Macintosh computer. They rock.
17. I think a bell should go off every time a PC person buys a Mac.
18. I wish there was a place to learn Latin here in LR.
19. I can remember complete conversations from years ago.
20. I don’t really like to talk on the phone, and it gives me a headache.
21. My oldest brother’s name is Rodney Dean, and my Dad’s name is Marvin Dean, and since my name is Dana Rene, we all have the nickname Deano.
22. I feel as if I am about 10 years behind in social development.
23. I like mustard sandwiches.
24. I am a tad paranoid, which I really think means I’m insecure.
25. I secretly like Nintendo games like Super Mario Brothers. I could save the princess in 1 AND 3!
26. Several people in my life have told me that when they dream about me I can walk.
27. I can recite the entire Berenstein B Book from memory, though I haven’t read it since I was a child.
28. My favorite book as a small child was Marvin K. Mooney by Dr. Seuss
29. I could never get tired of watching Little House on the Prairie.
30. My beloved cat, Miss Kitty passed away this month.
31. My parents have always opened their homes up to people. I can think of at least 3 sets of relatives who stayed with us for longer than 2 weeks.
32. When I was about 11, my Dad’s niece Ruth and her 2 sons came to stay with us, and she and I had an instant connection. She, never having had a daughter before, spoiled me rotten. I worshiped her, with her dark, Indian skin and blue eyes. Eventually, she decided to go back to Missouri, and I was devastated. I can’t describe how hard, or how long I cried, and all I could say was that I would never see her again. My poor mom didn’t know how to console me, and was secretly scared that the reason I thought I wouldn’t see her was because I was facing major surgery and might not make it. I made it through the surgery, but not long after, we got a phone call, that Ruth had been shot, and killed by someone gunning for her husband. I didn’t cry as much then, because I already knew.
33. I think the above incident is one reason I have such a hard time letting go.
34. I worry that I won’t be able to get another job if LA ever closes, because potential employers will dismiss me because of my disability.
35. I SO want another job.
36. I am trying to teach myself Flash. It is difficult.
37. I think if you asked most people what the biggest miracle I would ever hope for is, they would say a cure for Spinal Muscular Atrophy. Without a doubt that is true, but on a personal note, an even bigger miracle (besides just being alive) would be to find someone who could love me (in that special way) just as I am.
38. I haven’t seen my sister or her twin boys in over a year. It kinda makes me angry.
39. Sometimes I like to just do nothing.
40. I love Wendy for many reasons, but getting me involved in volunteerism is among the top.
41. I just watched Dirty Dancing AGAIN and must say that Dirty Dancing: Havannah Nights, isn’t worthy of the name.
42. I used to have to wear orthopedic shoes until I was about 10, then I had to wear tennis shoes all during middle school, so I’m SO happy to be able to wear anything that I’m becoming a shoe hound.
43. I know HOW to play chess, but I play intuitively, without thinking past the current move… that’s pretty much how I live too!
44. When I play a game with a child, I generally let them win. It’s not that important to me to win, and I know it is to them.
45. I got an autographed copy of one of the leaflets I designed for Christopher Lowell (design guru) and we all got a box of chocolates. I think that was very cool.
46. I don’t FEEL little.
47. I don’t understand people who can go through life being detached. “Connecting” with people is what it’s all about for me.
48. I like to color coordinate my watches with the rest of my outfit, so now I have about 10 watch bands. No good reason for this.

Holy Cow!

2006-08-09T18:00:00.000-07:00

My friend Di came to visit me this weekend and brought Jakson, her 5 year-old son. We decided to take him to see Barnyard; the Original Party Animal. The boy cows have UDDERS people. Where were the researchers? Do you need researchers to know boy cows don’t have UDDERS?!

I can’t stop thinking about it. And unlike the time I couldn’t stop thinking about some margaritas, this isn’t a pleasant memory.

Hummph!

Happy Birthday Wendy!!!

2006-07-24T16:58:00.000-07:00

I could get really mushy with this post because you and your friendship mean the world to me, and I’m tempted to list the ways that knowing you has changed my life. BUT you say all of my posts make you well up, and because this is your day, I want it to be the happiest of happies! ;)

You know I love you (just look at the smile on my face in the pic here – you did that!)
HAVE A GREAT ONE!

Gracie's Birthday

2006-06-12T18:20:00.000-07:00

Hi, I know I haven't been blogging it much lately, and I do apologize; I have been very busy, but that's no excuse :) Unfortunately, I can't promise to do better, but I can share some pics from Grace's Birthday with you :) As always, my mom made the cake and is very proud ;)

And that's the ABC's of Me. (Isn't that a line from a movie?)

2006-05-28T19:54:00.000-07:00

Accent: Probably, but I hate to admit it.

Bible Book that I like: I'll have to decide that later; I'm slowly working my way through it, and not sure yet which is my favorite.

Chore that I don't care for: I hate ANY paperwork. Yes, Jennie and Kathy, that does include taxes. Sorry :)

Dog or Cat: Dog and Cat.

Essential Electronics: Computer or Hairdryer.

Favorite Cologne: Intuition or something by Estée Lauder.

Gold or Silver: Silver.

Handbag I Carry most often: A beaded one from Diane.

Insomnia: Yes, every so often.

Job Title: Senior Publications Designer for Special Projects.

Kids: No :(

Last Movie Watched: Friends with Money. Don't take your mother.

Most Admirable Trait: I am nothing if not resilient.

Naughtiest childhood behavior: Smart mouthing my mother.

Overnight hospital stays: Hmmm. I think 11 or 12.

Phobias: Drowning, or someone breaking in.

Quote: I like a quote that says, "It is by chance that we have met, by choice that we are friends." It is kinda corny (like me) and I don't know who said it.

Religion: I like Jennie's definition.

Siblings: Yes. 2 brothers and a sister, and Michael.

Time I wake up: 8:30.

Unusual Talent or skill: I can remember complete conversations from years ago.

Vegetable I refuse to eat: Spinach from a can.

Worst habit: Worrying.

X-rays: Ummm, I'd say I'm close to 100 on that.

Yummy stuff I cook: I'm glad I don't cook, because if I did, I think I'd never eat!

Zoo animal I like most: I love giraffes.

Love/Despise... what's the difference?

2006-05-24T20:03:00.000-07:00

I haven't posted anything in a while and thought the least that I could do was a list :)

Words I despise:
drip
fart
soon

Sounds I despise:
any squirt
forced burps
cotton dragged across something

Foods I despise:
yogurt
greens
raw carrots

People I despise:
egomaniacs
snobs
untouchables

Celebrities I despise:
Alyssa Milano
Brittany Spears
Pamela Anderson

Cars I despise:
I really have no reason to despise any car - I got no beef with them!

Words I love:
friend
hope
magnanimous

Sounds I love:
laughter
the "new mail" sound on my computer
the burglar alarm setup confirmation

Foods I love:
KC Masterpiece Lays
Tamales
Fries

People I love:
my friends
my family
generous people (and I don't mean material generosity)

Animals I love:
dogs
cats
birds

Celebrities I love:
Lance Armstrong
Matt Damon
David Bazzel (well, ya knew it was coming)

Chores I love:
Chores? What chores? :)

Car I love:
Vans (for obvious reasons)
Mini-Coopers
MG Midgets

Music I love:
I know it's corny, but whenever I hear "you are my sunshine" I cry. I noticed this when I was teaching it to Scott, and welled up. One day I'll explain why.
Elton John
Tori

city of angels

2006-05-07T17:18:00.000-07:00

I've been wanting to post for a while, but haven't figured out how to articulate what I'm feeling without being sappy. I am going to give it a shot now because it is important me. So bear with me:

I have recently been lucky enough to be involved somewhat in the events leading up to Jennie's and J's wedding, and eventually the wedding itself. During this time (not JUST during this time, but this time has illustrated it more clearly to me) I have been blown over by the kindness and consideration of the people in the circle of friends originating in Batesville. Those of you know me, or at least those of you who have read the hundred things about me, know that I did not have a lot of friends growing up because I was pretty isolated. And I'm not whining about that; I'm just pointing out how new it is to me that because of these people, I can actually go someplace and not have to worry about whether it is going to be accessible, whether someone will help me find the ramp, whether someone will help me cut my food, whether l'll be able to participate in the activities, whether I'll feel included, or even how I'll get there, because I know that my friends are looking out for me. All of that gives me a feeling of security and confidence that I have never felt before, and I believe it is helping me become a stronger person. I can feel it happening.

So all of you of whom I speak know who you are and you should feel so proud for the people- for the friends- that you are! I can trace about 90% of the great things that've happened to me in the last several years to one specific moment and that is when Wendy Willets had the misfortune :) of walking into Leisure Arts. Her bad luck turned out to be my good luck, because from then on, I have been surrounded by angels on earth.

:)

good cheer

2006-04-20T18:48:00.000-07:00

I've had a bad week (not so bad as the hospital week - we must keep things in perspective) capped off today by the transmission in the van going out JUST in time for a deadline I have at work Monday, and another bad headache. I'm glad it went out this week instead of next, and I'm not one to lament often, but geez.

Anyway, in the midst of my mood, I got this picture in the email from my girl Wendy, and it cheered me up. :)

Diggin' Doogie

2006-04-17T19:01:00.000-07:00

Does anybody watch the new show called How I Met Your Mother? I don't watch it regularly, but I have seen it and I just wanted to say could Doogie Howser (Neil Patrick Harris) have grown to be any cuter? I mean seriously the bone structure in his face. Wow! And even as I write this I recall how Doogie used to always end the show by writing in his computer diary, sort of like I am right now.

See I told you that I am blogger blocked!
:)

Perfect Timing

2006-03-30T18:12:00.000-08:00

I just had to post this pic: my friend Di has been telling me that she got a birthday present for me, but she has had trouble because she got it off of ebay and it never showed, so she had to re-order it. All of this really got my curiosity up, but mostly I was just appreciative that she would go to so much trouble for me, regardless of the actual gift.

Well, Tuesday, I was home sick with a terrible headache and this package arrived.

I don’t know if you can see clearly enough, but that’s an AUTOGRAPHED picture of Lance Armstrong. It says, “Be strong. Lance Armstrong.” I’ve mentioned before how much inspiration I get from Armstrong, so you know how much this meant to me. The timing is impeccable. That’s the way it is with Di and me. Somehow we have this connection, and we can be miles apart, but she knows when I need a lift. We are soulmates, and sisterfriends.

I love you Di, Thanks!

Making it Better

2006-03-15T16:58:00.000-08:00

I just got home from the hospital earlier today, and I’m exhausted, and my voice isn’t working, and I’m a little stressed because my brother is getting sick (it looks like he caught it from me), and I just wanted to say what a lucky woman I am!

The fact that I have friends who wanted to come and sit and talk with me, bring me food to replace the hospital garbage, fix me baskets of goodies, wear a dr.’s mask to see me but keep from making me sicker, watch a favorite tv show on a red and green striped tv screen to keep me company, cook my dad’s dinner, send me flowers and bring me smutty magazines, and keep me and my family in their thoughts and prayers will always always overshadow any lack of sleep, needle pricks, bad medicine, or other unpleasantness of this week.

Thank you.
You guys make my life so much better.
I love you all, but you know that :)

Not what you'd expect.

2006-02-13T18:22:00.000-08:00

I don't like valentines day very much for obvious reasons, so I'm posting this account of something that happened to me a couple of weeks ago, because it brings a smile to my face everytime I think about it. Enjoy:

Ok, so it’s a Friday, and I have taken the day off from work to volunteer for the annual Make-A-Wish radiothon. Since I don’t have to be at Sam’s gas station until 11:50, I sleep until 8:30 or so, then get a weather report from my Dad before I get dressed. It has been raining but it is supposed to clear up and be a sunny 60 degrees, so I put on a long-sleeved t-shirt, another t-shirt, and a hoodie before I head to Sam’s thinking I’d rather be hot than cold this time of year.

Well, when I get out to the van, I notice it is colder than I thought, but no matter, it’s supposed to clear up. Pulling up to the check-in site, I see the volunteers who have all been there a while are shivering and pulling their jackets around tighter. My Dad offers to give me his coat before he lets me out, but I’m having none of that. In case ya haven’t noticed, I’m a tough girl. With determination (and I think looking back, a lack of good sense) I check in, getting my bucket for donations and motoring towards the gas pumps trying to ignore that cold breeze.

This is the first time I’ve volunteered for an event like this, so I’m a little nervous, but I see some friendly faces at the first row of pumps, so that’s where I decide to work. Besides 2 ladies from St. Vincent’s, I am greeted by a local celebrity whom I will refer to as DB (if you email me, I’ll tell you who this really is - some of you already know - but I’m trying to consider his privacy here – is that silly?). DB introduces himself, asks my name, shakes my hand, chats with me and the girls a while, and walks on to the next row of pumps, leaving us to do the job we’re here for; collecting donations for MAW. Man, is it cold. It can’t be more than 45 and that wind is harsh, but I’m trying to block that from my mind and approach all the vehicles I can, and soon my bucket starts to fill.

Here comes DB again. “Aren’t you cold?” he says. Me, “naw, I’m good.” “How ‘bout if I move my car up here so it’ll at least block you from the wind?” He insists, and at this point, I’m glad for the relief. The car is moved and it really does help. DB smiles as he walks by again, obviously glad to have helped, and I say thanks again. Now I’m sitting beside DB’s blazer until I see another car approach, then I do my duty, and return to my spot behind the car only after I’ve gotten more for my bucket.

I’ve been here an hour now, and it is really cold, and what doesn’t help is that the other 2 volunteer’s shifts are over so I’m working this row alone, so there is nothing to distract me from my numb fingers. Oh wait, here comes DB. He really is turning out to be a nice guy. First, he wants to know where I went to school and where I work, what I do, and after learning I’m a graphic artist he then tells me that he has something to show me, and goes into his Blazer and pulls out a business card that he designed and won an ADDY for. OK, I’m impressed. I know Art Directors who would sell their first born for an ADDY, yet DB doesn’t seem to be bragging, just proud. He gives me the card and says he wants to see some of my work sometime so I should email him, then he says, “you really look cold” and proceeds to take his jacket off and put it around my shoulders, all the while I’m insisting I’m fine (LIAR!) and he offers to wrap a red sweater he has in the infamous Blazer around my legs, but I have to draw the line here, though I can tell he’s disappointed. Did I mention DB is really handsome?

New volunteer’s arrive (though not at my station) and DB is off to greet them, and I continue to fill my bucket which has more than $60 already. DB’s jacket starts to fall from my shoulders, and the next time he approaches he asks if I did that on purpose or if it was falling, and quickly wraps it around me tightly when I answer. This time we have a nice conversation about my siblings, advances in technology and medicine and how they have helped me and my brother in respect to MD, movies, theaters, popcorn… it’s just so hard to believe this handsome, jock, celebrity is talking to me!

At about 2:30, I ask DB what time it is, and after telling me, he wants to know how long I’m here for, but doesn’t like my answer. “You are not staying until 4:00” he says, “you’re too cold!” He then asks if I am going to call and ask my dad to pick me up early, or if he is. I say I will, but ask him to help me get my phone (I couldn’t get to my phone because of the tightly wrapped jacket and frozen fingers), to which he says, “can I call?” and I can tell by the twinkle in his eye that he will enjoy calling so I give him my number, and this is what I hear on my end, “ Mrs. Vaughn, you don’t know me, but I’m here with your daughter, and she is beautiful, and sharp, and intelligent, and really cold. I don’t think she knew it was this cold out, ‘cause she didn’t dress appropriately, and I gave her my jacket, but I’m running out of clothes to give her, so could you send your husband to come get her? I’ve enjoyed talking to her and you’ve raised her well, but it’s just too cold for her…” UNBELIEVABLE.

So now we’re chatting and my dad pulls up, and off DB goes toward my dad with hand out stretched, saying what a trooper I am, and as I follow, he offers to let me keep the jacket, but I say no thanks, and he says to email him some samples sometime.

It was just so nice to have a little positive single male attention for once, and DB was SO nice and considerate that I smiled all weekend. In addition, I did email him the samples, along with a thank you for his kindness, and he was just as nice in his reply (a FULL PAGE) and gave me his phone number and said I should call him next time I’m dining in his area!

Of course I will probably never cross paths with DB again, but what fun it has been to think about those conversations we had that day!

Go Team!

2006-01-28T10:01:00.000-08:00

Today was the MDA’s Stride & Ride, and I just wanted to express my appreciation and gratitude to all of my friend’s who got up early on a Saturday to walk with me.

So, thank you, Lori, Jennie, Rebekah (I can't believe you drove from Arkadelphia!), Elaine, Dayle, Kathy, Robert, J (I know you were there in spirit :) ), and an extra special thank you to Wendy and Jason for not only walking but driving me there too! I appreciate, and love you all.

Together we raised $910 and I think that is awesome!
Next year, maybe we'll beat those darn Stantons!
:)

My Shameful Past

2006-01-13T18:31:00.000-08:00

Thanks to Jennie for coming up with Confession Friday, I’ve been trying to think of a new post and this gives me something :)

When I was a child of about 4 or 5 years, I was a bully. That’s right a bully. My target: my older brother. Yep, I managed to bully someone almost 4 years older than I. When I say bully, I don’t mean I stole his lunch money or anything, but when we argued, I’d say the thing that I KNEW would upset him most (I also have a bit of a temper) and sometimes I’d just taunt him about anything to make him mad. Here’s what I mean:

My mom says that on a number of occasions, we would be arguing, and outta nowhere I’d say, “Well, YOU can’t walk,” to which he’d reply, “UHHH, neither can you,” but I’d end the argument with “I can so, with crutches.” Though that always ended the argument, it didn’t upset him as much as my next tactic. It seems I had a doll that didn’t have any clothes and was bald and tattered looking, and I’d pull that doll out at random times (not caring who was around) and say, “Timmy, I have a baby that looks JUST like you.” Man, he hated that. It always made him so mad he’d literally cry.

One day, when I was about 5 or 6, my dad came home from work with this tiny, rubber, bald, bottle-sucking doll. He had it in his shirt pocket, and I remember him pulling it out and saying, “Dana, I have a baby that looks just like you.” I was devastated. I don’t know how long I cried, but I’ll never forget that. I think it hurt worse coming from my dad, but there couldn’t have been a better person to teach me a lesson, and I never taunted my brother that way again.

Looking back, I can’t believe I was such a brat. Whew! Aren’t we glad to grow up!
:)

The picture speaks for itself :)

2006-01-10T16:53:00.000-08:00

Anything for Jennie :)

2006-01-09T17:23:00.000-08:00

Four jobs you've had in your life:
1. Computer Room Monitor
2. Communications Intern
3. Orientation Leader (I don't know if these college ones count, but they're all I got)
4. Graphic Artist

Four movies you would watch over and over:
1. Dirty Dancing
2. About A Boy
3. Wizard of Oz
4. Notting Hill

Four TV shows you love to watch:
1. Lost
2. Project Runway
3. Moonlighting
4. Friends

Four places you have been on vacation:
1. Memphis, Tennessee
2. Florida, but I don't remember it
3. Poplar Bluff, Missouri (if you can call a long weekend in Misery a vacation :)

Four websites you visit daily:
1. Yahoo Mail
2. Creative Hotlist
3. Monster
4. Blogs

Four of your favorite foods:
1. Cheese Dip
2. Potato Chips
3. Good Tomales
4. Chocolate

Four things you would change about your house:
1. Make it Bigger
2. An indoor pool with wheelchair ramp
3. Remote controlled doors
4. New hardwood floors (the real ones)

Four bloggers you are tagging:
1. Kathy
2. Jason
3. Stephanie
4. Diane

little me too

2005-11-20T18:23:00.000-08:00

Ok, this is a horrible picture of me because I have on no makeup and look all of 12 years old, but I wanted to post it because it makes me laugh. You all have seen the pic of Scott riding on the back of my chair, well little sister wanted to try, and climbed up all by her self. Oh, my heart melts! :)

Ride or Stride

2005-10-09T13:26:00.000-07:00

Saturday, January 28th the Muscular Dystrophy Association is hosting an event called "Ride or Stride." The event is held at McCain mall and participants will ride or stride 1 mile in the air-conditionedheated environment to raise money for research.

The MDA suggests that participants gather in teams of 10 and each member raises $63 by getting sponsor donations. $63 pays for 1 minute of research, and an event T-Shirt.

I am posting this information to see if any of you would like to join me (and Wendy who has already graciously agreed :) for this event. If it looks like we can get a team of 10, I will contact the MDA office and get more information and fundraising materials.

Thanks for reading.

Too close for comfort.

2005-10-09T11:24:00.000-07:00

A few months ago, I, along with my friends Wendy and Jennie, went to Lenscrafters to get myself some new glasses. After about 20 minutes of picking out frames (as an aside that really has nothing to do with this post, I just want to say what fun it was to have Jennie and Wendy there helping me decide on frames. Shopping for glasses shouldn't be so fun:) I was approached by the salesperson who eventually sold me the glasses. The weird thing was that when she talked to me, she was at most 6 inches away from my face, and usually closer than that. I kept thinking that maybe I was having a bad day and just was oversensative to my personal space barriers, but I finally got a chance to mention to Wendy and Jennie that I felt the lady was doing a bit of close-talking. In fact, I said that there were a few scary moments when I thought the lady might kiss me. J & W verified that the lady actually WAS talking close, and that they were made uncomfortable by it and it wasn't even happening to them.

Well, after I went home, all that kinda faded from my mind as these things usually do... until yesterday, when I was shopping at Mccain Mall (completely different mall than the one where I purchased my glasses) and sitting with my Mom minding my own business, when I looked up from taking a bite of my cookie, and there was the face not 4 inches from mine, asking me if my glasses were working out. All I could do was mutter yes they are...

surprise, surprise

2005-09-25T18:14:00.000-07:00

Pure Nerd
69 % Nerd, 26% Geek, 39% Dork

For The Record:

A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia.
A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one.
A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/interactions.
You scored better than half in Nerd, earning you the title of: Pure Nerd.

The times, they are a-changing. It used to be that being exceptionally smart led to being unpopular, which would ultimately lead to picking up all of the traits and tendences associated with the "dork." No-longer. Being smart isn't as socially crippling as it once was, and even more so as you get older: eventually being a Pure Nerd will likely be replaced with the following label: Purely Successful.

Congratulations!

Gifts I Like :)

2005-08-12T17:48:00.000-07:00

Jennie made a list of things she likes to receive as gifts (A WHILE AGO), and I liked that idea, so here is my list.

1. I LOVE to get books. I so enjoy being able to talk about something I’m reading with someone who has read the same thing. I like poetry books because there have been so many times when I was feeling a certain way, and thinking that I was the only person who has ever felt that way (knowing that isn’t true, but when you are in a bad mood, it SEEMS that way) and opened up a book to find a poem that made me feel not so alone. I also like short stories.
2. I’m a girly girl (don’t let the short hair fool you) so I like jewelry. It doesn’t have to be expensive; I just like the unusual. My brother Rodney always gets me jewelry for Christmas, and I’m always excited about it because he puts a lot of thought into it.
3. Probably my favorite gift is time. Just going out to eat, or spending time with my friends is the thing I like best. Even on random days that aren’t associated with a specific occasion or holiday, when I get to be around people I love, it feels like a gift to me.
4. I also like it when people share THEIR likes or interest with me. For example, Wendy made a CD of music she likes for us to listen to on the way to Memphis, but we didn’t get a chance so she gave me the CD and I loved it! I hadn’t heard many of the songs, so it opened up new interests for me.
5. Ok, Ok, I like gift certificates too, but I would prefer it if it were hand made, promising some event or special personalized gift rather than to a store:)

Don't drop me!

2005-08-10T16:03:00.000-07:00

This is just a quick post to say hello to all, and to hopefully gain me a bit of time before Jennie drops me from her daily blog check list :). I promise a new post soon... it's just that I can't blog at work, so the idea of getting on the computer at home for more than a few seconds is not that appealing.

I have been enjoying reading all of your posts, though.

NUMBER 7

2005-07-24T13:19:00.000-07:00

Well, he’s done it again, and it was no surprise, but I am as excited as I was 7 years ago, when I first watched Lance Armstrong roll into Paris, and the history books. I am actually feeling a little teary-eyed after watching today’s final stage of the Tour. Seeing Lance all smiles, riding at various times, with interlocked hands, alongside various competitors and teammates and knowing that next year he will not compete made me admittedly a little sad. I mean sure, there will be another winner, and another story, but I think it will be quite sometime before an athlete with the ability to touch so many lives emerges.

I rarely go on about celebrities, and from the sound of things, you might think I idolize Mr. Armstrong, but that isn’t really accurate. I think it is better to say that I am inspired by him. True, I wear one of those fashionable armbands (livestrong, they say) but not because I’m following the masses, or because I think he’s really cool, or even because a treasured friend gave it to me. I wear it as a person who knows what it’s like to have the odds stacked against you, to fight daily to overcome challenges, and to succeed. Often, when I’m having a bad day, or am feeling especially tired, I glance down at my arm and see the now famous mantra, and things look a little less daunting. Afterall, if Lance can defeat cancer, if he can conquer golf ball sized tumors in his stomach, lungs, and brain, who am I to let a little thing like SMA define me?

I saw Lance on an interview today, and I think he was speaking to cynics and people who accuse him of doping (I won’t even go there) when he said something to the effect of “I'm sorry you don't believe in miracles. But this is a hell of a race…” Well, I can’t imagine one person who has ever watched him ride NOT believing in miracles; I know when I watch, I think anything is possible.

Livestrong.

Diane has a blog!

2005-07-17T18:03:00.000-07:00

Many of you have heard me speak of my friend Diane. She is a great person and I love her dearly. Now, you guys have the chance to know her a little too, because she started her own blog. It is http://jelloshatz.blogspot.com Stop by and check it out :)

I've been tagged!

2005-07-13T19:17:00.000-07:00

Thanks Jennie :) I still intend to do the gift list too, I just haven’t had a chance yet. I’m halfway there though.

10 years ago: I had been working at Leisure Arts 2 years. I doubt if I had become disenchanted with it yet, but surely I was on my way! I was 25! Whew! I feel so old sometimes.

5 years ago: I remember that year mostly because I had been VERY ill that winter (spent 10 days in the hospital over Christmas.) I probably spent most of the spring recovering… I remember that I had had to take so many steroids while I was sick that I developed “steroidal acne” and it was just awful because it took 6 months to go away. I had always been lucky with the zits ‘til then.

1 year ago: I was in 11th year at Leisure Arts and I know for certain that I had become disenchanted by then. I also joined a Bunco group that year and it has been SO much fun!

Yesterday: I had a bad day yesterday. I started out with the intention of helping someone, and it turned out that my eagerness to help came across as being pushy, and not helpful at all. Sometimes I know I try too hard to be a good friend, but it really is important to me.

Today: I had a good day. I went to work as usual, but when I came home, Gracie was waiting for me, and she can definitely make me forget everything. She is such a sweet baby. Now I’m working on a Make-A-Wish stuff, and that always makes me feel proud.

Tomorrow: I will finish the MAW work, and go to my real job. Just another day.

5 snacks I enjoy: Peanut Butter M&Ms, Reeses PBC, Ice cream, KC Masterpiece flavored Lays, Cheese

5 bands whose songs I know most of the lyrics to: this one is a little embarrassing because I know words to these band’s lyrics mainly because they are what my brother listened to over and over again as I was growing up: REO Speedwagon, Journey, Bon Jovi. My own likes are Natalie Merchant and Elton John.

5 things I would do with $100,000,000: Buy my parents a house, send my brother on a trip to see the Indian reservations, buy myself a car I could drive, hire a handsome driver in case I couldn’t, create a trust for my nephews and niece.

5 locations I'd like to run away to: New York, Greece, Italy, Spain, Hawaii

5 bad habits I have: being impatient, worrying too much, being too emotional, being disorganized, taking life too seriously

5 things I like doing: Being with my friends, reading, painting, blowing bubbles with Scott, sleeping (I’m really tired right now).

5 things I would never wear: Thongs (the underwear, not the shoes), a bikini, a halter top, double knit polyester like from the 70’s, false eyelashes

5 TV shows I like: The Real World, Blowout, Friends, Lance Chronicles, Lost

5 movies I like: The Wizard of Oz, Theory of Flight, Love Actually, Beauty and the Beast, Knotting Hill

5 famous people I'd like to meet: Oprah, Lance Armstrong, Peter Jennings (I’m so sorry he’s sick), Matt Damon, Natalie Merchant

5 biggest joys at the moment: Scott and Gracie, My friends (you know who you are), sitting on the deck in the evening and morning, Bunco, homemade icecream

5 favorite toys: my new headphones, computer, camera, new art desk, art supplies

5 people to tag: I think Jennie tagged most of the people I know who blog, but I would ad my friend Di to the list.

My Sister's Visit

2005-06-19T12:35:00.000-07:00

Hi, this is just a short note to tell about my Sister's visit this weekend. We had a great time, and it was good to see Pam (below)

and her twin boys Zack, and Nick (below) as well as David her husband of whom I failed to get a good photo.

Wide Open

2005-06-19T11:50:00.000-07:00

Those of you who know me well know what an emotional person I am, but believe it or not, I used to be even more so. I remember when I was a kid always making cards for people, even my older brothers who were mortified, telling them how much I loved them; sometimes even in the form of a rhyme. Funny when we're young we have no inhibitions about loving wide open.

Like many people I find myself becoming a little embarassed when I try to tell someone how much they mean to me, or when someone tells me the same, but I just think the alternative, to miss the chance to tell someone how important they are to you is so much worse.

It is to that end that I am writing this post. I was recently priviledged to go on a trip to Memphis with Wendy, Jennie, Melissa, and my Mom and one of her friends. In itself, a trip to Memphis is barely significant, but spending 3 days with these people was monumental to me. I seriously cannot say how much this trip, this time with these 5 women meant to me. Wendy, Jennie, and Melissa thank you. It was just Memphis, I know, but it was also about the freedom and possibility to travel places that I had almost given up on. I love you all for making it happen.

equal time

2005-06-06T17:38:00.000-07:00

kittycake
Originally uploaded by danarv.

Well, I posted all of Scott's BDay pics, and little sister Gracie demanded equal time. I'm starting with the cake. Yes, it looks like it has a runny nose, but my Mom made it with love!

Birthday Girl

2005-06-06T17:37:00.000-07:00

grace&outfit
Originally uploaded by danarv.

Here is the pretty birthday queen modeling her new dress, and the bracelet I gave her. Of course, she liked the box best. :)

Big Brother, Little Sister

2005-06-06T17:35:00.000-07:00

grace&scottBrace
Originally uploaded by danarv.

Here are Scott and Gracie cheesing it up... what fun we had!

Stephanie H. has a blog!!

2005-06-06T17:25:00.000-07:00

I promised Stephanie that I would tell everyone that she is joining in the blog fun! Unfortunately, I haven't figured out how to link to a word yet, so I'm just gonna give you the name of her site and let you do the work :) It is http://proactivebridesmaid.blogspot.com/

Enjoy!

More?!

2005-05-30T09:54:00.000-07:00

Well, I promised that I’d post this weekend, but due to the rain, my weekend was pretty uneventful. So in lieu of an exciting account of my weekend, I’m adding 5 more things about me (what an ego I must have!) I hope you enjoy:

1. When I was a kid, my Mom always said, “when you say something, it’s like a promise,” so I try to live like that, and never tell someone I will do something if I’m not sure I will.

2. I don’t buy it when people say, “I’m just too busy” when referring to spending time with friends… people have exactly enough time for the things that really matter to them.

3. I’m getting tan!!! I know I said I couldn’t, but I am for the first time ever, not pale!

4. I get depressed when it rains for very many days in a row. I NEED the sun.

5. I wish that I had more patience.

slacker

2005-05-25T19:36:00.000-07:00

This is just a quick post to say hello and tell everyone I'm sorry I have been such a blog slacker. I feared that I would be sporadic at best. I do intend to post something this weekend. Until then, I hope you all have a happy Memorial Day.
:)

Beginner's Luck

2005-05-09T20:01:00.000-07:00

I guess when I posted the first pic with Flikr, I was lucky, because I can't get it to work, but below are pictures from Scott's Bday. I love him and his family so! Oh, and my mom made the cake and was embarrassed, but I think it is cute. :)

Scott's BDay

2005-05-09T19:59:00.004-07:00

Scott's BDay

2005-05-09T19:59:00.003-07:00

Scott's BDay

2005-05-09T19:59:00.002-07:00

Scott's BDay

2005-05-09T19:59:00.001-07:00

Scott's BDay

2005-05-09T19:59:00.000-07:00

No Voice

2005-05-01T09:32:00.000-07:00

In my 100 things about me list, I mentioned that I ride public transportation and I promised more about that. I knew there would be more because in the 11 years I have been riding Links (a PARAtransit service for disabled, or ill people) there has been at least 1 incident per every 6 months. This is the latest.

I should mention first that I have to be really careful about contracting any communicable diseases because of my health and that of my brother. Sometimes it's difficult because people don't understand how serious even a cold can be, but I've gotten somewhat used to being assertive when it comes to my health. So when the Links driver showed up last week and told me he had no voice, I politely asked if he was contagious, and he whispered, "no, it's just the pollen." Somewhat skeptical, but really without much choice as I had no other transportation to work that day, I boarded the bus. It was then that the driver squeaked out vehemently, "besides, I aint gonna be touching you anyway- do you want to not ride?" and I said, "well we will be breathing the same air, but I have to ride. I just think in your profession, you might consider not coming to work if you are sick..." before I could explain why I held this position, or mention that he transports people on dialysis or chemo therapy and those people don't need to be exposed either, I was interupted with, "I just think you need to mind your own business." To which I said, "there's really no need to be rude," and then he said, "I'm sure you'd keep plenty busy if you minded your own business." And we rode in silence for the 15 minutes until we reached my work place.

It makes me a little sad as I really didn't mean to offend him, and we had gotten along well always before, but c'mon... is it really so much to ask that someone be a little concerned about the people around him? And was it really that offensive?! Not to mention the fact that I'd bet 10 to 1 that he was on a antihistimine for the "pollen" and shouldn't have been driving mass transit anyway.

I would appreciate comments on this blog... maybe you all can give me a different perspective.

15

2005-04-17T19:29:00.000-07:00

15
Originally uploaded by danarv.

Friday was my niece, Tabitha's 15th birthday. My mom and I always take
her shopping on her b-day weekend. Thought you might enjoy a picture of
us girls.

:)

PS She does know how to smile, but when you are 15, well, you know.

Good job, Mrs. Anonymous

2005-04-16T18:52:00.000-07:00

I mentioned in my 100 things about me that I have a pet peeve about people rushing on the elevator ahead of me, and now I'll tell a little story.

Whenever I go to Park Plaza to shop, I can expect that I will at some point be sitting and waiting for an elevator for minutes, only to have it arrive, and people who are perfectly capable of taking the stairs fill it up, leaving me to wait again. It happens especially frequently over Christmas, and this year seemed worse than ever. On one occasion I was waiting when a healthy-looking woman walked up with her healthy-looking son (at this point I might mention that by "healthy-looking" I mean they didn't look as if they had missed any meals, not that they looked all that healthy.) I heard the woman say to her son, "WE ARE NOT TAKING THE STAIRS" and sure enough, when the elevator arrived, they were the first 2 to pile on. I had HAD it and muttered, "EXCUSE YOU," and the conversation deteriorated.

After that, I made a vow to myself that I would keep my mouth shut no matter how frustrated I got, because voicing my opinion on these occasions could only really get me in trouble. So a couple of weeks ago, when I was waiting on the elevator, and a group of about 5 very big young men walked right past me and filled up the elevator, I was biting my tongue very hard (especially because these guys looked as if they might belong in a gang) and resigned myself to waiting on the next car.

It was at that moment that the most unexpected thing happened... after getting on the elevator and turning around, one of the guys saw me and said, "Dude, we need to get off and let her ride," and all of the young men marched right back off the elevator and let me ride.

I was pleasantly surprised, to say the least, and I told them thank you, that they were very nice, but I am still thinking about how these young men, who I had shamefully prejudged, showed me so much respect and consideration. At the time, I wished that I had known their mothers so I could tell them that they had raised their boys well, but since I don't know them, I will say it now, "Good job, Mrs. Anonymous."

100 things about me. Whew!

2005-04-02T19:58:00.000-08:00

I'm starting my blog with 100 things about me. Some of them are silly, and some are serious. I hope you enjoy reading them and getting to know me better. :)

1. I recently turned 35, but I don’t look more than 25. I used to hate looking so young but now I like it.
2. I don’t talk very much in crowds but I do like to be around people; I just prefer small groups.
3. I have Spinal Muscular Atrophy Type 2. I was first diagnosed with Type 1, but the diagnosis changed after I became older. My older brother Tim has it as well, and is a lot weaker than I physically. Mentally, well, I wish I could even compete.
4. I also have a half brother Rodney, and a half sister, Pam. Neither of them have SMA, nor do my 5 nephews and 1 niece.
5. I consider the day that Wendy Willets (now Bird) started working at Leisure Arts to be one of my luckiest days ever. Not only is she a great friend, and an inspiration in her giving nature and volunteerism, she introduced me to Jennie, Jason, J, Lori, Robert, and Kathy, all of whom have been so wonderful to include me in their lives.
6. When I was in grade school, disabled students were separated from the non-disabled students, and a class might consist of people who had very high IQ’s, but were physically handicapped, and people who were severely retarded. By the time I was in high school, mainstreaming had begun, but my parents wanted me to finish my education in “special education” because they were afraid I’d catch an illness in the mainstream, so my last few years of high school consisted of myself and about 4 other students, all but one of whom had severe retardation. So let’s just say I was a pretty lonely girl.
7. In college I was scared to death of not doing well. I had made straight A’s all of my life, but I was afraid that maybe that wouldn’t be good enough (considering the background) to get me through college. So instead of partying and developing friendships, I focused on grades. It paid off in that I graduated Cum Laude, but if I had to do it again, I definitely would have been more social.
8. (This one is for you Wendy.) When I was about 16, I was OBSESSED with professional wrestling. That’s right, your eyes aren’t playing tricks. There were some brothers in Texas named the Von Erichs, who wrestled, and I used to stay up until midnight every Saturday night, just to watch them, and once, they came to Jacksonville and my Dad took me and a friend, and I got to meet Kevin Von Erich, and he gave me his autograph. It is a great memory of my Dad and me but other than that, I’d just as soon forget that I liked wrestling.
9. I have a degree in fine arts with an emphasis in graphic design. I don’t remember deciding that I would major in art. I just knew I had to find a career that I might excel in despite my disability. I wish I had decided on law instead.
10. I actually considered majoring in Math, but the big “C” I eked out in college Algebra killed that aspiration.
11. I got scholarships all through college; so fortunately, I don’t have a lot of college loans to pay off.
12. I’m a crier. I don’t mean to be, but I just am. Sad movies, corny TV commercials, and sappy songs… any one of those can bring a tear to my eye. And the worst part is, I hate for people to see me cry. Once when I was teeny tiny, my mom asked me if I was crying, and I said, “no. It’s raining in my eyes.” I remember thinking she’d believe me.
13. I used to think that people could ward off tornadoes if they would all work together and put fans in their windows and doors (pointing outward) to cool down the air, since heat was always cited as the cause.
14. Once my brother caught a butterfly and it wouldn’t fly anymore, and I thought it was because he rubbed all of the butter off of it.
15. I’ve always been afraid of storms, but on March 1st several years ago, a friend’s husband was killed in a tornado. Oddly, since then I haven’t been as scared. I guess I feel that if she is strong enough to face it every time a storm comes up, after losing so much, who am I to be afraid?
16. Smokers make me angry. I have had pneumonia no less than 5 times in my life, and I can’t imagine what could possibly be worth risking the luxury of breathing easily.
17. My brother Rodney is someone I greatly admire, though I could never tell him. He had a rough childhood after my dad and his mom split, and he has been on his own since he was about 14. He took some time growing up, but now he is a great, hands on Dad to his kids, and a sweet and giving brother.
18. My sister Pam and I aren’t close at all and it makes me sad. We didn’t meet until I was 9 and she was 15, and at that time I worshiped her. She came to live with us right before Tim had major surgery, and was in the hospital 31 days. It was a tumultuous time because we nearly lost Tim, and my mom was at his side for the entire 31 days. Pam took care of me the whole time and I love her dearly. Unfortunately, she had issues of her own and ran away shortly thereafter, and we grew apart. I miss her.
19. I have had a friend named Michael Roetzel my entire life. I know he would do anything for me, and I for him. I’m embarrassed to admit that I played with Barbie dolls until I was 11 years old, but the thing that makes it better is that Michael played with me (with GI Joe of course) until then, which meant he was 13!
20. Michael’s children Scott, and Gracie call me Aunt Dana, and I can’t tell you the joy I get from them. His wife Melissa is now becoming like a sister too.
21. I can’t sing. I mean I can, but people don’t want to be around me when I do. In fact, there is a rule at my house that I can only sing with my door shut and the hair dryer going. Just one of the things I admire about Jennie McClain is her beautiful voice.
22. I like to play with numbers in my mind. Like on a digital clock, if it says 6:23, I’ll think about the fact that 2x3=6. Weird, huh?
23. I wear glasses. I have been wearing them since 7th grade. I’ve tried contacts about 4 times, and I always develop Giant Papillary Conjunctivitis. I want to try Gentle Molding, but my Dr. is conservative, so I doubt if he’ll go for it.
24. I’ve had 4 birthday parties in my life, and Wendy and Jennie threw all of them. Thank you guys.
25. One of my favorite things to do is sit outside on the deck and read. I’ve been there all day today.
26. I’ve owned 3 dogs and a cat in my life. My pets now are Teddie, and Miss Kitty. Teddie is a wild dog, but good at heart, and Miss Kitty is a sweetie.
27. Scrabble is my favorite game. I think I have a pretty good vocabulary, and playing Scrabble lets me exercise it.
28. I have a good friend named Diane Thomas. She says we are soul twins, and I think she is right. She is moving from Atlanta to Tulsa right now, and I’m so excited to have her closer. The last time I was seriously ill, Di spent hours at the hospital, just talking to me so I could forget about having trouble breathing, and just relax, which of course helped. She’s a doll.
29. If you ever want to win an argument with me, just give me the cold shoulder and I’ll crack. Really. Yell at me, curse at me, I don’t care, but don’t ignore me. I just hate that feeling.
30. When I was in high school, I belonged to Very Special Arts, which is an organization that pairs disabled people with professional artists. I was lucky enough to be paired with 2 artists who would come and show me different techniques, and let me experiment with a variety of media. That experience was invaluable.
31. Lance Armstrong is my favorite celebrity for obvious reasons. Matt Damon is a close second, again, for obvious reasons.
32. I am a really great aunt. I know this because my niece and nephews have told me often. I just love being around them.
33. I started reading Anna Karenina last summer, and haven’t finished yet. I don’t know why, but I think maybe because I haven’t been able to go outside and read much in the winter. I do like the book, so I don’t know what the problem is.
34. I started reading when I was 4. That is when I started kindergarten too.
35. I’ve never been on a date, but I have gotten 2 roses from boys before. The first boy, Craig, passed away several years ago, and the second, Sam, got fired from LA and left town.
36. When I was about 6, I was playing with Barbie and I told my mom that I wanted to have a wedding dress like Barbie’s when I grew up, and she got this serious look on her face and said, “you do know that nobody will want to marry you, right?” I know she was trying to be realistic, and keep me from being disappointed, but I wish she could have been a little more positive.
37. Sometimes I still secretly dream that there is a guy out there who could love me despite everything… I know that is just fantasy, but other disabled people get married. Heck, I don’t even want to get married. I just wish I could’ve dated once or twice.
38. I ride public transportation. Trust me, you’ll be hearing more about that in future blogs.
39. I have a pet peeve about able-bodied people jumping in front of me to get on an elevator. I know that sounds bad, but c’mon, if ya HAD to use the elevator would ya be so eager?
40. If I could drive, any car it would be a mini-cooper. I think they are SO cute.
41. I hate speaking in public, but I CAN do it. I’ve actually spoken in front of a ballroom full of people before. I have this ability to tell myself that whatever happens it is just a tiny fraction of my life, and people won’t remember it tomorrow.
42. I know a little Spanish, and I am about to try to become familiar with that language again. It comes pretty naturally to me.
43. I’ve never had a cavity.
44. I might have a slight bit of ADD. I can’t work and listen to music at the same time, or I’ll lose focus, and I tend to have to finish something completely before I move on to something else. Are those signs?
45. I did production work on the first computer-generated publication for Leisure Arts.
46. I’ve ridden a horse before. Well actually I just sat on the horse, but it was still a great feeling.
47. We used to have to go to Warm Springs Georgia every 4 months when I was a child. We went there because of the Roosevelt Foundations Polio Clinic; they were the best in the country at making crutches and leg braces etc.
48. I LOVE to blow bubbles. Now that Michael’s little boy, Scott, is old enough, I use him as an excuse to blow bubbles. I’ll be sad when he out grows it, but by then, Gracie will be in to it. I hope.
49. Brent Miller gave me my first book of poetry. It was by Sylvia Plath, and I still have it. He also introduced me to Cummings, Bukowski, and Winterson to name a few.
50. I don’t like the smell of beer, but I do like some alcoholic beverages. I don’t however, enjoy Wendy’s favorite, the Dirty Martini. Someone bought one for me before and I gave it to Di’s husband Rik. I told him it tasted like an armpit.
51. I once wrote a letter to the editor of the Democrat, and it was published.
52. I can’t buy a tan. Literally. The spray on stuff washes off, and I’m currently trying a sun lamp, but am not very hopeful.
53. I have short hair. I’ve had short hair off and on since I was 4. My mom says that I was quiet and meek until I got my hair cut off. I guess she thinks I’m loud now J
54. My least favorite word is “soon”
55. My most favorite word is “friend.”
56. My first concert was 2 years ago. I took Rodney to see Rod Stewart.
57. My last concert was John Mayer.
58. I love to watch stage shows. I’ve seen Stomp! (Twice,) 42nd street, Cats, Grease, Les Miserables, Chicago, Beauty and the Beast, Cinderella and Gypsy. I want to see Rent, and Cabaret.
59. If I could travel abroad, I would go to Greece, or Rome.
60. I used to want to be an archaeologist.
61. I won an award for a paper I wrote about Renaissance Artist, Lorenzo Lotto.
62. I am currently using my 7th wheelchair.
63. I believe that Macintosh’s are better than PC’s any day. It’s just a way of thinking. Macs are logical, common sense to me.
64. My parent’s are the BEST. They would do and have done anything in the world for me. I am alive because of them (well, I mean in a greater sense than them having given life to me.)
65. I am scared of Sushi. I find all seafood stinky and I’m afraid Sushi would be even worse.
66. I used to embroider when I was in the first and second grade.
67. My favorite Grandma (the only living grandparent I had from about age 9 to about age 30) once told my mom. “I finally figured out what I don’t like about Dana, and it is all the things I don’t like about myself.” It was a back handed compliment in that she was saying we were just alike, but whew, what a thing to say?!
68. I wish I had auburn hair.
69. I had bright green eyes until I was about 6, and then they changed to hazel.
70. I am afraid of most insects. I know they won’t hurt me, but I just can’t stand their squishy, antennae sporting bodies.
71. I love giving gifts. I think that is bad because I’m probably giving the gift for my own pleasure as much as the recipient’s, and I don’t think that is the way it is supposed to be.
72. Irises are my favorite flower.
73. I am right now chubbier and healthier than I have ever been in my life. I have actually gotten too big for all of my size 0 clothes, and can wear sizes 1, 2, and even 4 on some occasions.
74. I am actually a little over 5’ tall; you just can’t tell because I’m always seated.
75. I am not the shortest person in the family, my sister is only 4’ 11.”
76. I love sleeping. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again; I require 10 hours of sleep and would enjoy more, but I feel it’s wrong to sleep when you could be doing anything else.
77. I belong to a Bunco group and I LOVE it. I’ve never been part of a big group of girls like that and it’s just fun!
78. I have been in the hospital over 11 times, and I used to not want visitors at all, but I’m learning it is ok to let people in.
79. I have a recurring dream that all of my teeth just fall out, and then I get very embarrassed and they start to grow back.
80. I will not call in sick to work unless I really am sick, and I have about 2 months worth of sick time saved up because of this.
81. One time when I was about 12 (I remember it being shortly after the spinal surgery I had when I was 11) a kid was pushing me in my chair down a hill, and I thought he was going too fast, and I told him to slow down but he didn’t so I turned around to see him standing yards back. His hands were slippery and he accidentally let go, so when I turned back around it was just in time to see the tree that I was about to hit. Luckily, all I got from that was a gash in my eyebrow (I still have the scar) and about 3 stitches.
82. I have noticed that I say, “bless your heart” way too often. I’m working on that.
83. I’ve also noticed that I wink sometimes when I smile. I really need to stop that too.
84. I could never sit on a jury where there was a possibility of a death sentence verdict. I fear it would pray on me forever.
85. I am terrible at geography, and I am not even good at navigating around my own town.
86. I love reality shows. I’m not proud of it, but it is true. I especially like the Real World, which I think never gets enough credit for starting it all.
87. I have never been in an auto accident, but once on the school bus, the driver stopped too suddenly and my chair flipped over. It warped my wheel and gave me a black eye. The school board bought me a new wheel.
88. I think dandelions are flowers, not weeds.
89. I’m not close to any of my 1st cousins, but I have some distant cousins who are my age who live in Missouri and come to visit often. They are great.
90. I refer to Missouri on most occasions as “misery” because we would go there to visit my grandma who lived on a farm, and the mosquitoes were like birds.
91. I have been known to eat 5 bowls of homemade ice cream in one sitting. I love it so much that I don’t even care that I’m generally Lactose intolerant.
92. I used to love to watch Land of the Lost on Saturday mornings, but the Sleestaks (sp) grossed me out. Funny thing is I thought it was so real looking and I’ve seen clips of it lately and it was just hokey. Black and white footage mixed with color… just so fake.
93. I am of the philosophy that people should automatically receive my respect, but I think that if I were of the philosophy that people should earn my respect, I’d be better off.
94. I love paper. Nothing is better than a brand new pad of drawing paper.
95. I have freckles.
96. I love to watch the Tour de France, and I am happy that Lance will ride again.
97. I voted this year for the very first time. I’m ashamed that it was the first time, but proud that I finally did it.
98. I most often evaluate food based on texture rather than taste.
99. I smile a lot.
100. I used to want a tattoo, but now I know that it would disappoint my Dad too much and I couldn’t stand that.